If you’ve read a review of anything in the modern age of the¬†internet, then you’ve no doubt noticed that at some point the¬†reviewer, without wanting to sacrifice his or her viewpoint, ¬†will need to include some information that might just ruin the¬†movie for those that have not seen it. ¬†A spoiler alert, as it’s¬†most commonly referred to, is then utilized to shield your virgin¬†eyes from whatever sensitive nuggets of truth the writer has¬†decided to divulge. ¬†It’s up to you whether you want to read it¬†or not. ¬†Thus is the beauty of the spoiler alert.

This goes back further than the internet, for sure. ¬†I’m¬†reminded of an old Simpsons episode in which Homer exits the¬†theater after watching The Empire Strikes Back and exclaims,¬†SPOILER ALERT “Wow, what an ending! ¬†Who woulda thought that¬†Darth Vader was Luke Skywalker’s father!” right in front of¬†eager moviegoers waiting in line to see it.¬† What a¬† classic scene and a perfect picture of straight up old school movie spoiling.

As we trudge on through this cosmic ballet (thank you Leonard¬†Nimoy) I’ve come to greatly appreciate, ¬†yet also grow¬†intensely weary at the deployment of this technique. ¬†As a¬†reader, I am eternally grateful to the writer who saves me from having the end of Gerard Butler’s masterpiece, Gamer (available on DVD and blu-ray) spoiled but as a writer I am¬†increasingly frustrated with being hampered by the very thing I¬†consider sacred. ¬†When does the statute of limitations run out¬†on including spoilery material in a review of a movie or a TV¬†show? ¬†We all take for granted the fact that we’ve seen Star¬†Wars but how about the 10 year old that’s introduced to it for¬†the first time knowing already that SPOILER ALERT: Darth¬†Vader is Luke’s father?

Star Wars is an obvious example but the reason I’m using it is because I know everyone can relate to the magnitude of a spoiler of that kind.¬† To me, it depends on the movie.¬† Movies like Empire or Planet of the Apes for example have completely merged with pop culture so it’s ludicrous to think that we should all have a neutered discussion about these movies in public for fear of subjecting the innocent to the massive twists in them.¬† So is there a number we can hang on this? ¬†Does the passage of¬†time dissolve any notion of a spoiler?¬†¬† Should we all shout from the rooftops that SPOILER ALERT Soylent Green is people and for everyone to just get over it?¬† I’m not looking to¬†establish something officially sanctioned by the Breach, but rather compile feedback. ¬†It’s something to think about, which is why I decided to write these thoughts down and pose these questions to you the, reader.