As a species, humans take a lot of things for granted. We put off life events knowing that we’ll have time to get to “it” at some point. Luxury cruises or visiting a foreign land- no matter the dream it will be achieved eventually. People have this immortal attitude when it comes to getting things [...]
“Well we just don’t do repairs on them because of how complicated matters are with the DVD drive,” said the clerk over the phone. Disappointed, the Wii breaker asked, “Well would there be any chance that I could borrow your tri-wing screwdriver so I can attempt the repair myself?” “Unfortunately we can’t allow that; it’s [...]
He cracked open the fortune cookie and while eating the first half, read aloud to his wife. “Luck is the result of good planning,” and then he ate the other half, thus agreeing with the fortune. The wife commented, “Well that definitely applies to you.” “How so?” “All that video equipment you’ve purchased over the [...]
For the first time in two years, an animated movie is not on my favorite movie of the year. In fact, there was barely an animated movie on my list but change is a good thing. I’ve been pretty happy with the movies released this year and this was the easiest 10 I’ve done yet. [...]
With a holiday dedicated to stuffing your belly four days passed, I figured the suppressed Catholicism in my veins would bust out a good ol’ guilt trip on you. Since February I have radically altered by lifestyle from a somewhat gluttonous and lethargic existence to one filled with health conscious meals and an average of [...]
Yeah I said I was going to post something about my weightless this week given the whole holiday thing but then I remembered that I’m lazy and would rather satirize corporate America in time for Black Friday. Enjoy! Digg Stumble Upon Del.icio.us Buzz
Whereas some drunk folks will begin writing about the promotion that slipped away or that heartbreaker of a soul mate, I am putting paint to canvas on a much more important matter. And rather than beat around the bush with more clever diatribes, I’ll get right to the point. Celery, and all things therein, is a terrible invention.
What is this? Where are we? This is a new column I would like to present on a weekly basis. Whether we get passed this first posting I cannot promise but this seems just as good excuse as any to start blogging more. Rather than the reviews I used to post in the past, this [...]
This hurricane debacle has struck a nerve with me. For those that don’t follow my Twitter or G+, I was traveling in the North East last week for work. Specifically, I was flying into Philadelphia and then driving down to Atlantic City. By Wednesday evening, a dooms day scenario was in full effect for anything resembling an East Coast State. David Chen from /Film tweeted an article predicting with a 20% chance that New York City’s subways could be flooded come Saturday, thus destroying everything mankind has worked to achieve. While stopping for a break at a gas station Friday morning, every newspaper available had a headline that reiterated how screwed we were. Finally at the airport, just to aid in the hysteria, every TV available was tuned to developments on the storm as it lumbered across the ocean, hungry for blood.
But not like a mental breakdown, more like an En Vogue breakdown. And not like you’re never going to get it but… Ok well let’s move on then alright? I don’t know if this will be a regular article or just a one time thing but I wanted to do a more “bloggy”-type write up [...]
Here’s the deal, go read my review from The Hangover from two years ago. ¬†No, seriously I’ll give you a few minutes. ¬†Take your time. Ok, are you finished? ¬†Great, you’ve read my review of The Hangover II. ¬†Only this time imagine there’s little surprise and a lot of stuff is overblown to try and [...]
What can I say about Thor that hasn’t already been bellowed from every other blog mountain? I liked it, didn’t love it. It was enjoyable, but not necessarily good. Performances all around were solid. But I guess I should fill out a few paragraphs right? I can’t just say “it’s worth your money but not your 3D money” and then move on can I? Ok fine, here we go.
Ok, I’m done. I will no longer drive a four cylinder vehicle. As much as I love my Honda Fit, it can’t drift for shit. Those were the kinds of thoughts I had driving home from seeing Fast Five, or the fifth entry in the Fast And The Furious franchise. Critics and assholes alike love saying stuff like “this movie jump starts the Summer season” but that would be a bit on the nose. I’ll just say that for this critic/asshole, I couldn’t have spent two more enjoyable hours than I did watching this film.
Read the rest after the jump!
This movie is three recognizable faces from being on SyFy’s most dangerous night of television.¬† I apologize in advance for the snark about to let loose, but I cannot abide while a movie that mixes zombies, vampires, and werewolves bores me so much that I leave before seeing a Q/A with the director. Dylan Dog: [...]
Let me begin by admitting I am a huge Scream fan and apologist. ¬†I came to know the first film in the Summer of 1997 when a buddy couldn’t stop talking about it. ¬†And I’ll admit that the ending completely fooled me. ¬†Then the second film came out that December and although I did not [...]
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